Who knew Fairview had so many hills?

This past Saturday I ran my first half marathon in 7 months, The Showdown Half in Fairview, TX. And there were many differences between this one and the first one. Some were good differences and some were bad...

1. I was definitely less nervous about this one. But I still didn't sleep all that well the night before. I dreamed about forgetting stuff and getting stuck on the course. (neither of which happend, by the way)

2. I was NOT in as good a shape as I was for the Rock 'n Roll one. I didn't train the way I should have and did pretty much none of my mid-week runs. And I only trained to 8 miles. And I felt every bit of my lack of training on pretty much every mile.

3. I carried my own water this time. It was so much better than having to depend on aide stations.

4. Because I didn't train past 8 miles, I miss judged my food. I was crazy hungry by the end of the race. Not good. But definitely a lesson learned.

5. Heidi and I stayed together for most of the race. In the Rock n Roll I went ahaed and finished about 10 minutes ahead of her. Not this time, we finished together. She might have even beat me. But it was good to run together. We pretty much kept each other going.

6. This was a much smaller race. It was easy to get to, easy to park, and easy to grab lunch right after. I LOVED that part of it. Not sure I will ever do a big race again (okay, I MIGHT do another one, I just really liked the size of this one).

7. Greg met me at the end. I loved seeing him at the finish line after I had just ran 13.1 miles AND he gave me a kiss even though I looked gross and I didn't even want to touch me.

8. I finished 30 minutes slower this race. That's not good BUT it has given me motivation to get in more training (and maybe loose a few pounds between now and my New Years Day half)

9. Hills. I hate hills. I pretty much stay away from hills on all training runs and I don't look at elevation maps before races because its never been an issue before BUT I was mistaken this time. Who knew Fairview had so many hills? I do now. Because I ran EVERY. DANG. ONE. of them on Saturday.

Elevation for Showdown Marathon

 And since I was fooled on this race, I thought I would look up the elevation for my next half in two weeks...

Elevation for Chosen Marathon

AND now I am officially scared for the Chosen Marathon in New Braunfels. Maybe I will 'injur' myself between now and then and I can just cheer Evie on rather than have to run it myself? It's not like I get a medal at the end. Hmmm...

I have made the decision to not run the Dallas Half (which I had sort of set my sights on before Saturday) and drop my training all the way back down to 6 miles before training up to a New Years Day Half.

In other news...

I am still in grad school (and beginning to have lots of assignments due)
I am still a high school teacher (and beginning to drown at work)
I am still dating Greg (and it just gets better)
I am still trying to loose weight (this will be a life long struggle)
I am still hanging out with my fantastic friends (although not nearly as often as I would like)

That's all for now...

Love Always,
Cynthia

This Weekend...

Okay, friends, my first half marathon in 7 months is TOMORROW. I am nervous, scared, and really, just praying that I finish. So, please join me in that same prayer. I AM excited about the meal after though.

Here are the statistics for the weekend...

Goal: FINISH

I will write more when it is over. :)

Happy Friday!

-Cynthia

My heart grieves

When a young person dies, my heart grieves. It grieves for memories not made, loves not realized, fun not discovered, and a life not lived completely.

This school year has been like no other. 2.5 weeks ago we lost a senior boy. He was a member of the Varsity football team and was popular around school. I didn't know him but I knew his sister and many of my students knew him and were friends with him. I grieved for him, as the school grieved for him, but I wasn't as affected by it because I didn't notice the absence or quiet in my class that day, or any of the weeks that have followed.

Then, this past weekend, I got the news that one of my own students had committed suicide. A life cut short too soon. A death that could have been prevented. And I ask why.  Why did he think things were so bad that he needed to end his life to escape? Was he looking for attention? Did he really understand what he was doing? I don't think we will ever know. And we are left to question what we did to affect this kid. What was the last thing I said to him during 4th period on Friday? Was he thinking about what he was going to do while sitting in my class doing his work? Did I spend enough time getting to know him and too much time teaching geography? Because when it comes down to it, my job is about people and relationships. Have I invested in my students enough? There are so many questions.

And because I don't have answers, I cry. Because I don't know what else to do, I cry. I can't bring him back and have a chance to help him seek help. I can't make the hurt any less for those he left behind in his classes, in his school and in his life. I can't cure the silence that now haunts my 4th period because they all know he is gone. So, I cry. Life has been put in perspective. And things that used to matter don't matter as much. Is it more important to count calories or just enjoy the company I am with when I eat? Is it more important to get up and work out at the sacrifice of spending time with the people I love the night before?

So many questions. Not enough answers.

So, I cry for two lives lost too soon. And I cry for a group of students who have been confronted with the reality of life in a very real way.

And I pray. For the administrators, counselors, and teachers that work with a school that is grieving. I pray for Jesus to wrap his arms around Creekview HS. I pray for this to make us stronger. I pray for us to be able to seize these teachable moments that have been given to us. But mostly I pray for comfort and peace. For that is what we all need right now.

But I know, at least for the next few weeks, my heart will grieve for two high school boys lost too soon.

Love Always,
Cynthia

The Stats:
# of workouts: 6/7
# of days eating right: 2/7
# of lbs lost (total): 8

One Week Later

Hello Friends!

This past week has been full of ups and downs since my post last week.

Let's first talk about the low points...

Eating. This is always the hardest part for me and again, I didn't eat well this past weekend. There were times that I got so hungry and tired that I just ate whatever I wanted. Not good. I can excercise all I want but if I don't eat right, it doesnt matter. Ugh. Must. Do. Better. This. Weekend.

Working out. I didn't work out Sunday-Tuesday of this week. Must do better on this next week as well.

BUT...there were some high points...

I worked out 6 days in a row last week and was really good on food for 4 of those days.

After my last post, my friend Heidi emailed me and offered to run with me on Saturday (because she is training for the Showdown Half) and I took her up on it! We met at Celebration Park in Allen and put in 8 miles. 8 miles, people! That's huge for me right now. And while it hurt while we were doing it. And we did walk for a bit, I felt good afterwords. No soreness at all. I was on cloud nine all day on Saturday. Well, until I crashed around 10pm while having a conversation with Courtney and Greg. Oh well. It's a good thing they understand.

My friend Evie also contacted me and shared with me that she is in the same place as me mentally preparing for this Half. The 27th should be interesting. But we will survive together.

In other news, Greg and I had a fantastic weekend laying low and just hanging out together. Friday night we went to a local concert in Lewsiville and enjoyed good food and good music. Then on Saturday we just hung out and grilled for dinner. Well, to be real, he grilled and I played on pinterest. Then on Sunday was church, lunch, and a Sunday afternoon nap. My kind of weekend.

I also went over to my friend Courtney's mom's house on Sunday evening for an awesome dinner and good company.

Overall, it was a great weekend for me. I hope it was for you too.

Love Always,
Cynthia

The stats...
# of Workouts: 6/9
# of days eating right: 5/9
# of lbs lost: 4

It's Been Too Long

Since my running adventure last semester ended I haven't felt like I have had a whole lot to write about. I was busy getting to know Greg more and more and life just got crazy busy and it had nothing to do with running or working out. And as a result I have gotten out of shape and have been going crazy because of it. So, in June I decided that I wanted to run a race with my friend Evie from college. We set our sights on the Chosen Marathon in New Branusfuls on October 27th. I was still 4 months out and I thought it would be super easy to get in shape again. After all, I had done it once, it couldn't be THAT hard. Yeah, I was wrong. Fast forward to now and I am 6 WEEKS out and I can't even run longer than 3 miles without stopping and I haven't gone longer than 5 miles in total. I am frusturated with this. I should be farther along than this. And I can keep coming up with excuses, like school started and I am tired (true statement) OR its more fun to hang out with Greg than get up and run (which it is) OR I have homework I have to do. But the truth is, running is just hard right now, I don't have a running partner (I miss you Heidi!) and I simply don't want to do it. I need to get back to the point where I do. I want to be able to run the Dallas Half Marathon in December and I want to be able to improve my time at the New Years Double in December/Janurary. I stopped working out with Will so I have gone without weights for a while but have recently starting lifting weights again because I know the benefit when it comes to leg strength. I am hoping it begins helping.

I have also decided I am going to start blogging again. Hopefully at least once a week...perhaps more. If I am thinking about it more often it will motivate me to get to where I can run again and I will want to run again. Also, Teal and Beth are going to begin training for another marathon and I am always inspired by other runners so I am hoping to feed off of them.

So here it is...my goals for the month of September and October...

Fitness Goals:

1. Loose 10lbs. I have done nothing but gain weight since March so this is super important to me. I am not going to be able to run 13.1 miles if I am carrying around this extra weight.
2. Run 3 times per week, including my long runs. I am not sure my body can take the 4 days a week training schedule I did before but I HAVE to run at least 3 times to get my legs to where they will carry me 13.1 miles.
3. Survive the Chosen Marathon on October 27th. That's it. Just survive.

Life Goals:

1. Find a balance between my friends, boyfriend, family, work, school, and accomplishing my fitness goals. There has got to be one...I just need to find out what mine is.

That's it, my friends. Easy, right? Yeah, probably not. Just continue to pray for me. Ask me how it's going. Or offer to work out with me. :)

Until next week...or tomorrow...I will continue my journey...one step at a time.

Love always,
Cynthia

Turths

I get this every year in an email of some form, but everytime I read them I am reminded of just how true they are. I thought this would be fun to share on a Friday (and the last day of work for me!)

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.

22. I would rather try to carry 10 over-loaded plastic bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

28. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every year?

29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode
of transportation, I always hate bicyclists.

31. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

Happy Friday!

-Cynthia

Another School Year Down: Thanks You's and Lessons Learned

Those of us not working in the real world start our years in August and end our years in May. We write New Years Resolutions in August and say our goodbyes and have party's in May to celebrate the ending of yet another school year.

As I look back on this past year it has definitely been an up and down ride. So many high's such as running a half-marathon, being back in grad school and meeting Greg. And so many lows, like being sick for three weeks in April, sitting at countles cheerleading events and moving in the middle of the year. No matter what happend this year, there were so many people who helped me get through. They listened to me complain, cry, whine, and place blame. Then they helped me enjoy life, laugh and smile. And told me that it will be okay. And it was.

So, to them, I say thank you...

Courtney - my best friend who listened to me talk about almost everything this year. From cheerleading drama, to grad school frusturations, to running stories...she listened to it all. And is still my friend. Be impressed folks, she's kind of amazing.

Greg - when we met I kept telling him not to get too comfortable until he had survived the school year with me. I'm not sure he knew what he was getting himself into, but he did stick around long enough to figure it out. And he's still around...3 months, 2 weeks of sickness and 1 spring show later.

Mom - Thanks for answering the phone at 7:30am. And for coming into town occassionally to have lunch.

Heather - There were times this year where you single handedly allowed me to survive in the classroom. And you listened to me complain about cheer and talk about life. You make me want to be a better teacher and allow me that opportunity by your generosity.

Teal - You gave me so much this year...encouragement, listening, laughter, stories, inspiration, accountability. Thanks for everything.

Laurie - Thanks for the occassional dinner/lunch/breakfast to talk about life and love. You are the best. And you're children are kind of cute. I may love them.

John, Solomon, and Kristin (and all FUMC Youth and Counselors) - Too often I didn't show up or follow through with commitments or events this year. And you all just understood and welcomed me back whenever I could come. Thanks for being flexible with my schedule and telling me to keep breathing...probably when I needed to hear it most.

Through everything I have also learned a few lessons...

1. Life is easier when you work out/run everyday. The only reason I didn't lose it this year was because I was running 45 minutes everyday.

2. There will always be people who make your life harder. Find the people who make your life easier and spend your time with them.

3. Sometimes the hardest decisions to make are the ones that turn out to be the best for you. And sometimes you hurt people in the process. And that's hard. But it doesn't mean it was the wrong decision.

4. Life changes really fast.

5. There are times to take control of your life and times to let go. The first is easier but the second is more fun.

6. The only way I am productive is if I make myself a list.

7. It is important to be a global citizen. If there is one thing teaching world geography has taught me, it is that there is more than one story about a place and it is our job to learn a different story and then tell it.

8. Laughter and long talks are the best cure for anything!

9. I really do love to learn. Being back in graduate school has reignited my love of learning something new and challenging myself.

10. I am stronger than I think I am.

Now, I am ready for summer!

-Cynthia